EveN my deepest dOubts and fears are nothing in coMparison to the love that Jesus offers and yeah, I believe this, but it is sO hard to pRactice it in my life. I say in onE breath that I love Him and follow Him and in the next I am totally dishonouring Him and that is Crap. And in trUe Roman's style, "the Things I do want to do I do not do and the Things I do not want to do I do" so here Is my pledge to Not do those things or at least tell God that I do not want to and hope that in His strength I can do this for that is promised and I pray without doubting that His Grace is sufficient for me, that in my weakness He is strong and that afterall is said and done that I be a light unto the world, speak of His love and grace and tell people that no angels, nor demons, heaven or earth or anything else will seperate them (or me or you) from the love He offers us, that in Him we can trust to lead and guide us, that His love will conquer all because without love we can do nothing but with love, we can move mountains through Him who saves us from the place where souls weep and where there is gnashing of teeth.
One more thing... for so long I have defined myself as a "fucking idiot" because that is what I've heard so much. I change my mind and now every time I call myself that (or want to) I'll just tell satan to "FUCK OFF because I am one of God's beautiful children, I am his beloved Princess and cherished daughter" Sorry for language, but hey, I'm in survival mode, and when you are there, holiness and language don't play a huge role... just surving and keeping satan away so that God has a chance to get in and be the Master Surgeon. Right now I have this bad infection around my heart, and I need to fight it off so that my Surgeon can do some open heart surgery!
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